just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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