You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
