well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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