READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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