Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Randomize
