Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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