so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
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