David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
