ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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