Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
