Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
It's shark week go big or go home
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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