I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
