I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
