I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
