From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
