Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
