i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
