I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize