Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
