You're my little dorito
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
