I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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