Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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