used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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