so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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