Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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