you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
