Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
