just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Randomize
