i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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