So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
