It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
