Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
