He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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