So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
