Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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