is your mom at the bar?
I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
