it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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