Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
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