At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
