god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
