TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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