whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
