need another drink. this is the easiest way
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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