if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
