I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I'm way too hungover for life right now
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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