too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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