I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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