Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize