Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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