new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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